Lemongrass is my Weed.

Yeah! Lemongrass! Ward off evil bloodsucking bugs and get high at the same time! It's legal, and it's cheap. Keep your summer bug free and drug-dealer free! No one will say anything if they see you with a brandname lemongrass product in your hand. It's the "it" thing! Get yours today, and get a bug-free enviroment and a noteworthy high. Any lemongrass product will do; we guarantee it! (The term "lemongrass product" refers to any product containing lemongrass and has potential for warding off bugs and creating euphoria. Guarantee void in Earth, Pluto, Halley's Comet, the Milky Way, and the universe. Not to be used on human beings, lemongrass not included.)

Yeah, I haven't done an infomercial in SOOOO long, but now I've broken my fast and it feels GOOOOD!!! I didn't even realise how much I missed taking it out on the ad industry. Now that I think about it, most of those infomercials were on Cyberfae. Hmm. I'll just go and copy over some of those posts, along with Tatanya-the-cohost's responses.

"Tatanya, come over during spring break and try our delicious line of maple products, including maple syrup, maple candy, and sugar-spun maple leaves! In fact, try a bag of our famous maple sugar! You can use it where-ever convetional sugar is used, except for in the making of chocolate, pudding, and dairy products. Try some today, eh?" -- Talking about Canada

"NOW YOU CAN CARRY YOUR BESTEST FRIENDS WITH YOU WHEREVER YOU GO, WITH OUR NEW BRING-A-FRIEND FRIEND CONDENSING MACHINE!! YOU'LL NEVER HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT THEM NOT FITTING AGAIN!! some assembly required, batteries not included." -- Talking about fitting friends into overhead compartments

Hey, I just ran into that thread where we were all scientifical and Einstein and everything!!! (Ahh... memories.) http://www.cyberfae.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=852

Me (Faefae): "And now, a word from our sponser: ARE YOU TIRED OF HEART PROBLEMS AND THE CONSTANT MEDICATION THAT IT COMES WITH? HAVE YOU EVER THOUGHT THAT HERBAL MEDICINE MIGHT WORK MUCH, MUCH BETTER? WELL, YOU SHOULD TRY FOXGLOVE, OUR 100% ALL NATURAL LEAFY PLANT, NON-CLINICALLY PROVEN TO CURE HEART ATTACKS. IF THIS DOESNT WORK FOR YOU, YOU CAN GET YOUR MONEY BACK! offer void if customer dies. side effects may include swollen face, heart failure, stroke, blood poisoning, and sudden death."
Tatanya: "IS THERE AN AGE LIMIT ON PURCHASING YOUR PRODUCT?"
Me: "Keep out of reach of children under 50. (because they are too healthy to die, and then they'd want their money back) We are not responsible for any medical difficulties caused by the underage intake of our product."
Me (in a later post): "If you have already deceased due to our products, this product is not for you. if you suffer from the undead syndrome, please consult your mortitian before use."

Me: "THE CREATE-A-SMILE INFORMERCIALS!!! ALL EPISODES AVAILABLE ON ONE DVD!!! THOSE WITTY ADS FOR THE PRODUCTS YOU WISH YOU HAD ON A DISK THAT YOU CAN ENJOY ANYTIME YOU WANT!!!"
Tatanya: "THIS DVD INCLUDES ALL OF THE VARIOUS "FOXGLOVE" INFOMERCIALS* THAT YOU LOVE! *you cannot call any of the contact information on ANY of the "FOXGLOVE" infomercials due to various lawsuits filed by the undead... "
Me: "According to rule #7882*, the undead minority counts counts as a branch of the dead, rendering those lawsuits void. *Source: Faefae's guide to debate and politics " -- Right after the Foxglove incident.

Oh the wondrous frabjous days! Oh the Calloohs and Callays! (I luv my Jabberwockyness)

I love reading old threads.

Anyway. Yesterday was the International Anti-Drug Day or something like that. Thought I'd mention that before you guys go off smoking lemongrass.

After months of searching, I've finally found Tithe, at the Quebec Library thingamabob. (I forgot what it's called again.) I'm happy, of course, and I'll start reading as soon as I finish Pendragon 5 (Black Water). But still; you'd think it would take me a little (a lot) less than a few MONTHS to find such a prominent book, especially if I've searched multiple libraries (municipal libraries, too). I mean, what's wrong with people that they go and buy books that practically NOBODY has heard of and doesn't even have blurbs, but they don't buy Tithe??? I mean, even if you're french-speaking and don't know much about the English-speaking world the least you can do is check the NYT bestseller list. And then there's the library that has Valiant, but not Tithe. How can you have just the sequel but not the prequel??? Hasn't it occured to you that if SOOOO many people borrowed that book that maybe, just maybe, at least SOMEONE wants the first book??? Same goes for the people who have Nicolsen's Wind on Fire #1 and #3, but not #2! I've been waiting for Slaves of Mastery since FOREVER!!!!!!!!! I mean, just because almost the only books that I actually buy are the Artemis Fowl books doesn't mean I should be less able than other people to read a bestseller that I want, because as much that I like the books and stuff, I don't go and spend $20 on a hardback. Even with AF mine are all paperbacks and bought off the Scholastic catalogue or book fair. If someone has too many books that they wanna read to buy all of them, and they happen to be stuck in a french-speaking city with a sucky library system (I've known WAAAAY better), they shouldn't be condemed to have a reading list compromised drastically because of a simple and stupid reason like not finding the book even though it's a flippin well known bestseller. If they can find books with stupid names like "Bob" than they should, with good reason, be able to find a book like Tithe. Heck! Even The Wish List was hard find, and I've only just got it at the same time as Tithe (I'll read it after Tithe).

Must go off and fume.

When life gives you lemons, throw them at people who piss you off.

Citrus juice could benefit your bone health. Another reason to drink lemon juice.

Back from three days of camping and being mauled by bugs. The evil black flies bit everywhere and I've got blood stains on my favorite tees and hat. I also flew off my bike while mountain biking, but hey, it was my first time. Canoeing against the wind and 5 inch waves was fun but scary, since we were in constant danger of being tipped over and we were far from camp.

Onwards.

Japan's at it again, trying to claim Chinese stuff as their own. This time, it's a character from a traditional classic. It's a famous book and the title can roughly be translated as "The Journey West" and every flippin chinese kid knows the basic storyline, or they're just retarded. If you say that the characters are japanese stuff, EVERYONE will laugh in your face or beat you with a 10ft stick. Personally, I'd beat you with the stick. But see, japs are just retarded morons half the time, and anime/nintendo freaks the other half. Not that there's anything wrong with anime and nintendo (my fave self-portrait is a compromised chibi-style, and I love Super Mario Bros Smash), but they think that just because they invented this popular and brainwashy art style and a leading video game company they can go and brainwash people into forgetting japan's involvement in WWII. Bastarded Bums!!! Their soldiers were BETTING to see who could kill the most chinese people!!! They thought it was game!!! And the jap population SUPPORTED them!!! WHAT KIND OF MORONIC COUNTRY ACTUALLY SUPPORTS THE SLAUGHTERING OF INNOCENT PEOPLE AS A GAME???!!! YOU BASED YOUR BLOODY LANGUAGE OFF OURS, YOU BLOODY BASTARDS!!! WE GAVE YOU A BASE FOR YOUR BLOODY CULTURE!!! WE GAVE YOU THE BLOODY NAME OF YOUR BLOODY COUNTRY!!!!!!! We hate you with a passion, and with a reason. You think that just because you erased the chapter from your children's history textbooks that the rest of the world will forget it too? Your children WILL inherit your discrace and be shamed because of your brutality, and they'll know it and feel it. People like Iris Chang went mad and DIED trying to tell the world of your actions, trying to counter your bloody coverup. You might be a modern superpower, but never forget that you're JUST A MEASLY LITTLE SPECK!!!! YOU THINK YOU CAN TRY AND TAKE OVER CHINA? YOU THOUGHT YOU WOULD SUCCEED? IT ONLY SHOWS YOUR IGNORANCE AND STUPIDITY AND YOU CAN SHOVE YOUR FRIGGIN PLANS UP YOUR FRIGGIN BUTT!!!!!! YOU, A MEASELY ANT, WILL NOT SILENCE A GIANT. We may frown upon europe for being backstabbing bandits and raiding our land, but your backstab was even more demonic and an act of evil, not greed. Compared to you, the devil is sweeter than an angel. History's most atrocious act of pure evil is but a note in the margins; in that you may have succeeded. But people like Iris Chang turned that scribbled note into a book, a bestseller. The western world will hate you with a passion as strong as the one of the eastern world and we will make you bend under our glare and APOLOGIZE as you should have long ago. WE ARE YOUR ELDERS!!! YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO CONQUER YOUR ELDERS!!! Your actions are more than comparable to the seven deadly sins. Pride: you thought you could conquer the dormant dragon. Envy: you stare after our culture and land. Gluttony: you should've been content with the land and people you had. Lust: your soldiers raped the women of the cities they attacked. Anger: you hate us, though we did nothing to you. Greed: you took treasures from the homes you raided. Sloth: instead of working towards a rich culture, you sought to steal it. And as if taking everything hadn't been enough, you silly japs had to kill everyone several over purely for spite. You lined them up and shot them several times with machine guns. Then you buried them alive. Then you burned them. Then you drowned them and dumped them in a river. WHY WON'T YOU JUST FRIGGIN APOLOGIZE???!!! For once, history shan't be written by the oppressors, but the oppressed. The wrath has been kindled inside the souls of a peaceful people.

It's "Camera-Go-Clicking-Spree" Day!!!

Today's the day of the devil!!! It's the SIXTH day of the SIXTH month of the SIXTH year: 6-6-6!!!

But that doesn't really stop it from being "Camera-Go-Clicking-Spree" Day. Or from being Massi's birthday. But back to "Camera-Go-Clicking-Spree" Day. Lemme explain: Today was the last day of school (minus exams), so a lot of people brought CAMERAS. And they GO and take pictures of everything and the camera goes CLICK. And then they go on a SPREE to take photos of anything and everything. I didn't just take photos. I recorded.

"Let's take Notes on who pisses us off." -- Quoth It's Happy Bunny.

You guys know it's not "Happy Bunny", but "It's Happy Bunny"?

JUNE FIRST WAS MY BIRTHDAY!!!! YAY!!!! W00T!!!! GO ME!!! I'M 14!!!

*nods* Anyway. Today* was pwnful (*Disclaimer: the term "Today" is used vaguely and should not be taken literally. Said term refers only to the time frame starting at second period, approximately 10:00, and ending at approximately 3:05, at which time I was picked up from school and shipped to the dentist's for the purpose of the treatment of a cavity). In math class, the mental math exam was flippin' easy and then we got our term 4 marks (Me=100% XD). She forced us into this oddish formation and we took a class pic (Camera-Go-Clicking-Spree, remember). Afterwards we actually had a party: a PARTY, in Flores's class. With FOOD that she bought. And we were actually TALKING. (Tiff was like: "We're gonna be sitting there and trying to talk and she'll be like 'Lower your voices. Eat your food quietly. Or I'll have to keep you in after the bell.'") Toward the end she gave a mini speech about how she was gonna miss us and all that blah. When she said that we were welcome to visit her anytime, you could tell that not many people had bothered actually visiting her (Any prizes for guess why?). She got all sentimental and was like "I'm trying not to cry here." So then after that at recess I just took a lot of pics of the library (Our nerdish hangout!) and some of the gang. Computer class we got to just do what we want on the internet, but they were really old Mac OS anyway, so that really doesn't count for much. Couldn't even "Search Inside" when I looked up The Will of the Empress on Amazon. *shakes head*. After that at lunch I went to the dance show and recorded the finale. I was holding up the camera for like fifteen minutes and my arm got sore. I could've drowned myself when I went swimming afterwards in gym class because of all the blood rushing back to my arms. And since we were swimming, that means: NOODLE HORSEY!!! Oh, and Marie-Andre and Tiff were racing to see who could swim the fastest (Tiff won). And then the VP announced that I got the highest mark in the school for the scholastic competition and I had to go and change and all that before I went to get my medal (they had to call me down twice because it took so long).

And now, I will go enjoy my pretty medal then get a good night's sleep before I flunk my french exam tomorow.