Alliterations.
For as long as live, I will be jealous of people with awesome names. Especially if said names match their chosen personas to a tee. Especially if there is absolutely to need or want for a pseudonym because the real name is that much cooler than any possibly conceivable fake name. I hate you guys. See the pretty shade of green that is my envy. But I've come to accept that as just one of the many different ways that life may choose to mess with my head. Variety is the spice of life, eh? Wouldn't want it to stick to just one way of repeatedly screwing me over.
But, there come certain names that push it. They pop out at you from among the thousands of names that brush past your ears and compel you to find out more about the person behind the name. But not only that, they are alliterations. Yeah, that's right. Names that contain a poetry device. Seriously. These are the names that glare at you from the letters you see on your computer screen. It's like their parents were clairvoyant and just knew that their precious little darling would seek a career where they could use that extra boost in the advertising department.
This would likely bother me less in any other industry. Catchy names are useful, but in most fields, you can easily make it up. In business, only your company's name matters; think of something catchy, and leave those boring losers behind. In law, by the time anyone actually pays attention to your name, it no longer defines your reputation. In music, it's your voice, your skill, your pretty face. But what of the art of the written word?
"A rose by any other name would still smell as sweet." In a land where words rule supreme and your personality is portrayed only by that series of letters, whoever came up with that saying shot crap out of their lips. When you see a Japanese name listed as the artist of a comic book, without even a glance at the cover art, you go, "omg. Another manga." A typical English name followed by a Chinese surname, "Yet another book about so-and-so's parents and their harsh and daring escape from teh ebil oppressors to the sweet promise of America and freedom." Some boring small town name like Mary Smith, and "it's probably some cheap thriller romance." Names speak volumes in this industry, where it's the second thing people see (or even the first), right under the title. Alliterations are subtle and catchy. They make people remember the name that much easier. They catch the eye. They make for all sorts of cool graphic design tricks.
Fantasy writers with alliteration names that scream the genre like the name of their main character, these people need to be shot. Cassandra Clare? Tiffany Trent? Beth Bernobich? Cecil Castellucci? Seriously, are you absolutely positive that your parents have never seen the future? The only way the rest of us can even hope to shake off the unfortunate impression generated by our names and catch up to the unfair head start of you people's reputations is by coming up with some super awesome nom-de-plume. And for all that it's legit and common practice, it feels like cheating, somehow.
But, there come certain names that push it. They pop out at you from among the thousands of names that brush past your ears and compel you to find out more about the person behind the name. But not only that, they are alliterations. Yeah, that's right. Names that contain a poetry device. Seriously. These are the names that glare at you from the letters you see on your computer screen. It's like their parents were clairvoyant and just knew that their precious little darling would seek a career where they could use that extra boost in the advertising department.
This would likely bother me less in any other industry. Catchy names are useful, but in most fields, you can easily make it up. In business, only your company's name matters; think of something catchy, and leave those boring losers behind. In law, by the time anyone actually pays attention to your name, it no longer defines your reputation. In music, it's your voice, your skill, your pretty face. But what of the art of the written word?
"A rose by any other name would still smell as sweet." In a land where words rule supreme and your personality is portrayed only by that series of letters, whoever came up with that saying shot crap out of their lips. When you see a Japanese name listed as the artist of a comic book, without even a glance at the cover art, you go, "omg. Another manga." A typical English name followed by a Chinese surname, "Yet another book about so-and-so's parents and their harsh and daring escape from teh ebil oppressors to the sweet promise of America and freedom." Some boring small town name like Mary Smith, and "it's probably some cheap thriller romance." Names speak volumes in this industry, where it's the second thing people see (or even the first), right under the title. Alliterations are subtle and catchy. They make people remember the name that much easier. They catch the eye. They make for all sorts of cool graphic design tricks.
Fantasy writers with alliteration names that scream the genre like the name of their main character, these people need to be shot. Cassandra Clare? Tiffany Trent? Beth Bernobich? Cecil Castellucci? Seriously, are you absolutely positive that your parents have never seen the future? The only way the rest of us can even hope to shake off the unfortunate impression generated by our names and catch up to the unfair head start of you people's reputations is by coming up with some super awesome nom-de-plume. And for all that it's legit and common practice, it feels like cheating, somehow.
posted by Rosefae at 9:58 PM
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